One baby, two names.

I’ve always wanted to name a baby. I am not quite at the point where I want to have said baby, but I’ve always wanted to name one. What power! What overarching Destiny and Fate shaping responsibility!

We hear it all the time (at least I did as a kid): ‘Your name defines what kind of person you will be.’ By logical deduction, it will therefore also define what kind of life you will lead. A wealthy life, a love-filled life, a drug-filled life, or a depressed life.

Notice how I thought of wealthy before love? Eh.. that’s for another time.

Maybe I binge watch too much TV because my name is Zain. Maybe I’m not confident with approaching women because my name is Zain. Maybe I’m not 6’4” because MY NAME IS ZAIN. I would really like to see someone test this age-old adage. Are we really hopelessly bound to our fates because our parents decided to name us Becky because their friends’ stole Lauryn for their own kid? Here’s what I want to see: One baby, Two names. I want to give Baby name-A, and let him live his life from birth to death. When he dies, we measure how well he did in terms of quantifiable factors: wealth, love, family, health, lifespan, happy moments, triumphs, infatuations, tears, screams, nights spent in the bathtub. And then we rewind to the moment Baby was born, and give him name-B and repeat. I would really like to know if Baby’s life is ANY different. I want to know exactly what changes because of nothing other than his name.

Then I’ll finally be able to decide if I’m to blame for my problems, or my darn parents.